No tags, no links – unless you want to. If you feel so inclined, leave your six-word meme in the combox, telling something about how you feel about your mom…or, if you’re a mom, what motherhood means to you.
I’ve got several -
“Thanks for not stopping at eight.”
“Reason for future sainthood? Me, perhaps.”
“Always ready to explain her joy.”
“Courageous in the face of hardship.”
Happy Mother’s Day, Mom. Love ya!
So Time.com has published a list of the 10 Best Mothers Ever from the world of pop culture. They came up with a list of the 10 Worst Mothers, too – but who in their right mind celebrates the worst of something on a day like Mother’s Day? I guess some folks at Time.com do that.
On top of that, Time.com’s list of 10 Best Mothers Ever included such pop culture gems as Gaia at number 3, and the Alien Queen Mother (from the Aliens movie) at number 10. I know – stupid, right?
Here’s what the brainiacs at Time.com said about Gaia:
Greek gods and goddesses have their own set of morals that have nothing to do with how things roll in the world of mere mortals. So don’t hold it against Gaia that she married her son Uranus (look it up, it’s real), and had him later castrated — that’s just how the Greek deities did their thing. What is important here is that Gaia, also known in English as Mother Earth, is responsible for the things we love on this planet. Things like: the oceans, the skies, the fields, the plains. Respect Mother Earth and you respect yourself.
This is the same Gaia that also gives us earthquakes, volcanoes, hurricanes and winter, isn’t it? Or are those things the kind of chastisements a loving mother gives her kids to keep ‘em in line? I dunno – Earth worship ain’t my thing.
Regarding the Alien queen mum…
Fans of the Aliens movie franchise most likely remember the Queen alien as a force of intergalactic evil. True, she is the mother who lays the molten eggs, which eventually turn into lots of mean little buggers that seem to exist solely to torment Sigourney Weaver’s Ripley and kill everyone close to her. But what is the Queen really doing when she spews acidic saliva and hurls her inner mandibles toward a human’s neck? She’s protecting her babies, trying to find them safe haven and nutritious food to make them grow into big, strong healthy aliens. Like all good moms, she will take out anyone who is a threat. Focused (perhaps to a fault) on guarding her young, she is the ultimate mother warrior. And she doesn’t even expect her kids to buy her flowers on Mother’s Day. Now, that’s a champ.
Perhaps it’s all tongue in cheek, but the thought of admiring an alien as a Great Mother leaves me wondering – does the author have mommy issues or something?
Happy Mother’s Day to all the moms who didn’t make the lists – I’m sure you’re grateful.
Nothing says “Happy Mother’s Day!” quite like an IUD. Sick.
From The Washington Post: This Mother’s Day, Support Family Planning by Debra Haffner
There’s nothing I’m prouder of than being the mother of two children, now 17 and 25. Both were planned, both were very much wanted, and as Mother’s Day approaches, I reflect on how blessed I am to have each of them as part of my life.
Lucky for her kids they were planned and wanted. Just think how unloved they would be, how resentful she would feel, if they were anything but. Yo Debra – great that you feel blessed and proud and all – but there are a lot of moms out there who love and feel pride about their unplanned kids, too. I’d like to think my mom is proud to have me as a son, unplanned as I was, for instance.
But we know that all too often, and for too many women, this is not always the case. In the United States alone, half of all pregnancies are still unintended, despite widespread availability of contraception. In nations lacking access to family planning services, the situation is even more dramatic, with new analyses showing that unintended pregnancies around the world could drop by more than two thirds, from 75 million in 2008 to 22 million per year if universal family planning services were available.
See, according to Debra, the only good pregnancy, the only worthwhile pregnancy, is a planned pregnancy. This anti-life pro-pleasure mentality brings with it it’s own set of peculiar curses: hubris, disdain and a sense of haughty omniscience. To her, an unintended pregnancy is a prison term, or a stigma.
And “universal family planning services” also refers to sterilization. To me, that’s the only way to quickly drive down the number of unintended pregnancies. Did you know, for instance, that Rwanda is looking at providing vasectomies for nearly 700,000 men in three years? They might not be forced vasectomies, and they might not be targeted at the poor or undesirables – but such programs can easily be manipulated, and do a great disservice to human dignity.
It is inconceivable to me that some who are anti-abortion are also anti-contraception. As the Open Letter to Religious Leaders on Maternal Mortality and Reproductive Justice states: “The sacredness of human life is best upheld when women and men create human life intentionally and women are able to have healthy pregnancies and childbirths. We affirm women and men as moral agents who have the capacity, right, and responsibility to make their own decisions about procreation, including family size and the spacing of their children.”
It’s inconceivable (what, is that supposed to be irony)?? That some who are pro-life are also anti-contraception? Does she not realize that some forms of birth control are abortifacient? Apparently so. Does she not realize that increased use of contraceptives leads to an increase in abortion? I guess not. Does she not recognize that sexual relations between a husband and wife are sacred and holy, and that outside of marriage, it’s evil – which is where most unintended pregnancies occur?
Maybe so. Notice how intentionally subjective that religious statement is. Use of the terms “women and men” (pro-feminist switch there, didja notice?) rather than “wife and husband” – showing that she apparently doesn’t believe that sexual relations is only holy and sacred within a marriage. No mention of God – setting up the man and woman as sole arbiters of what is moral, sacred and good.
That’s not a religious statement at all – it’s a purely secular humanist one. Intentionality is sacred; healthfulness is holy – implications that unplanned is evil, and difficulties or imperfections are bad. These are the attitudes of the Elite and Know-Betters. They certainly aren’t Christian beliefs.
There’s more at the WaPo – I’ve cited more than I care to. Click here to read the rest, if you want.
This article is not about celebrating motherhood. It’s an article celebrating pure and unadulterated liberal feminism, which is anti-motherhood. Motherhood is about service and sacrifice, unconditional love and care for the children God has blessed her with. It’s about denying the self and discovering joy and happiness in the process of giving one’s self to the other. There’s a certain depth and breadth to motherhood that fatherhood can never hope to reach. Motherhood is a gift to the child and the family, and the mother receives much more than she gives in return.
What kind of insane world must Debra live in, where limiting motherhood is the best Mother’s Day present a mom could receive?
Note: The Rev Debra Hafner is a Unitarian Universalist, and was the CEO of SIECUS (Sexuality Information and Education Council of the United States) for 12 years. Draw your own conclusions from that…
The kind of thing my younger brother and I would do…
Happy Mother’s Day to all the moms out there!
By the time LarryD made his appearance in the world, way back when in 1965, my mother had had plenty of experience. I was the ninth of ten kids – six boys, four girls (I was the “tie-breaker”, and my younger brother was the “empty net goal”). She was an SAHM, managing the home and raising us ankle-biters with the perfect combination of loving embrace and firm hand.
The most important thing to my mom was living, learning and teaching the Catholic faith. She was a convert to Catholicism – she told me that when she met my dad in college, she was impressed that such a “manly” man (football player, ex-Navy) professed to being a faithful Catholic, and he lived it. So much so, it inspired her to convert.
She taught us our prayers long before we set foot in the parochial schools. First thing every morning, before breakfast or turning on the TV on Saturday’s, we had to recite the Morning Prayer, kneeling before the image of the Sacred Heart hanging in our living room. Prayers before and after each meal. Family rosary every evening. Frequent confession -how many times my mom would say “That’s it! Confession this Saturday!”
All of us attended Catholic schools, K-8 and high school. Hey, with that many kids, the ‘multi-child’ discount was so good, it was almost as if the school was paying my folks to have us attend.
By the time I was of school-age, the initial shockwave of the Second Vatican Council had rippled through, and subsequent tremors were making their effects felt across the Diocese. Of course, I was too young to notice any of this, but it did not take my parents by surprise. One story my mother told me involved the all-girls high school attended by my sisters – she got into an argument with the principal because the school invited Planned Parenthood in to make a human sexuality presentation. Apparently, it was epic.
She would review all the religion class materials we brought home to verify they were faithful to Church teaching, and on many occasions, had to set us straight on the Truth.
She taught us all boys how to wash the kitchen floor, scrub down a bathroom, iron shirts and make beds. We didn’t get an automatic dishwasher until I went to college – until then, we had the “two legged” variety. Chores were assigned and posted on a spreadsheet prominently posted on a kitchen cupbaord.
Nearly all of us learned a musical instrument – some more than one – and most of us learned the piano. It helped that she was proficient on both the piano and the cello – and it was pointless trying to pull a fast one concerning practicing, but it was great having her expertise available to work through a difficult passage.
Her cooking was awesome – and she was gracious in passing along her skills. I learned much from her, and will be eternally grateful.
She loved our father (and still does – they’re celebrating their 60th anniversary next month) and never displayed signs of disagreement or anger in front of the kids. If there’s one thing I had confidence in while growing up, it was that I knew my parents were always going to stay together. It was the age of “no-fault” divorce, and I had friends who were suffering the ill-effects of quick divorce – but that was one fear I never experienced.
She showed no preference, yet loved all of us unconditionally. As we grew up and moved out, getting married and starting families, she showed respect by maintaining her distance and not inserting herself into any of our marriages. She admitted to me once that it was hard for her to bite her tongue, to dish out some unsolicitied advice, but bite it she did. I know she prayed, and continues to pray, a lot of rosaries.
Now I’m not naive to think that my mom was perfect. It wasn’t always a bed of roses – how could it be with ten teenagers across a twenty year period? – and I’m not wearing rose-colored glasses. But this is Mother’s Day, and it’s not the time to recall Mommie Dearest moments. And I never would, because that would be detraction at worst, and the selfish failings of a wounded memory at best.
All I know is – any screw-ups I’ve had in my life were the result of my own stubbornness and stupidity, not the parenting and love of my mother.
So Happy Mother’s Day, Mom.
And I still make my bed. And say my prayers.
