10. Tired of trying to keep up with Eye of the Tiber.
9. Th ” ” k y is brok n on my laptop and I’m too lazy to g t th darn thing r pair d.
8. Heterophobes leaving nasty vitriolic ad hominem comments on my “Same Sex ‘Marriage’ Has Ruined Dr Who For Me” post have finally broken my spirit.
7. Lawyers from National Catholic Distorter have promised to drop all libel charges if I stop blogging.
5. There are 3 other people living in my home, and I figure now’s as good a time as any to introduce myself.
4. The guy who did all my photoshop work finally got good and now he wants to charge me.
3. Sr Patricia is suing for greater creative control, and the only way to stop her is to close down the blog.
2. There are no more womynpreests jokes.
1. I just wished the Blorg liked me.
Okay. Ha ha, and all that.
Let me give you the real reasons why I’m stopping. Or perhaps an extended hiatus. Or a sabloggital. I really don’t know yet.
There are three.
Blame the chicks over at CatholicMom.com if you must – I was invited to participate in the Lawn Chair Catechism over the summer, where we reviewed Sherry Weddell’s book “Forming Intentional Disciples”. As a result, I’ve experienced the irresistible tug on my heart from the source of Love itself, like a wayward comet being pulled into a sun’s gravitational field. I need to focus more intently on the next part of this journey, and the blog can be a distraction. In some ways, the blog is an insatiable idol that demands more and more of me, and while I still enjoy the writing, and expressing my creativity, and releasing the Snarken – I have to make a choice. I’m not talented enough to do both well.
I’ve gone over this with my spiritual director, and he assures me I’m choosing the better portion. I’m going to participate in the Called & Gifted workshop, which starts in October, and see where I’m at on the path when that’s over.
2) I have a story to write
This may sound contradictory to #1, but it’s not. In fact, the two fit together like a mortice and tenon. The discernment process will strengthen my writing, and writing the story will sharpen the discernment. I like to think I’ve mastered the art of blogging – as one friend told me, I’ve earned my degree, now get out and apply it. Some folks out there can compartmentalize these different facets – blogging, writing, discernment – but I haven’t the skill set to do that. I applaud those who can juggle those things with apparent ease. Something’s gotta give, so AoftheA it is.
3) I have to fix some crap
I don’t mean “stuff”. I mean crap. Serious weapons-grade level crap. I can’t say what it is, not yet at least. It involves the discernment and the writing. It’s like this. One thing I’ve learned – finally – about blogging, and about life in general, is that everybody carries at the very least two crosses: the one they want people to think they’re struggling with, and the one known only to them and God. I wish I had learned that a long time ago – then maybe the crap I have to fix would be less crappy. Can’t change it now, but if I was smarter, I would have learned it much sooner.
Let me describe it this way. I see the result God has in store for me, and I’m holding a box of parts, but I don’t have any instructions on how the parts go together to achieve the result I see. And when I look in the box, there are no parts that look like a blog. So I’m not going to add parts I don’t need, to fully realize that which God has intended. That’s how I see it for me right now. I have to step away, to stop feeding the idol, to stop stroking the ego. God has given me my box of parts, and He has shown me what I’m to build. He has the instructions, and He will hand them to me one step at a time.
This isn’t easy, because the blog has been a huge part of my life the past 5-1/2 years. It was a blast to write, and the Catholic blogosphere is a crazy and fun place to play in. I’ve made many friends over that time – and maybe pissed a few of you off as well. The contests, the lists, the 3-1/2 Time-outs Tuesdays (I give in, Jennifer – you have vanquished me, Catholic Internet Meme Queen!), Talk Like a Pirate and Talk Like Shakespeare Days, Fantasy Bishball, Strange Creatures of our World, SCHISM – all the different things that have made AoftheA a fun and fantastic blog to write. And to read, I hope. I shall miss it. But it’s time to stop.
Will AoftheA be back? Don’t know. It may be different, it may be the same. I really can’t say. I may even come back doing something entirely different. It’s in God’s hands. All I know is that right now, at this instant, I have to lay it aside. I’m not deleting the blog, because I may return, and the comments will remain open. And besides, as long as there are womynpreests, then the “Adopt-A-Priestess” project has a purpose.
I’ll still read the blogs I subscribe to, and will leave the occasional comment. I’m going to try very hard to not post again, but you never know – temptations can be powerful. And I still have some unfinished business.
Thank you for allowing me to entertain you and be a part of your regular, or irregular, reading habit. I am humbled and honored that over 724,000 people have visited this stupid little blog. I’m glad I was able to make you laugh or smile, and maybe even groan at the puns and jokes. And perhaps even think a little from time to time.
I understand this might be a shock to many, and perhaps relief to a few. I thought it best to give my reasons rather than just stop posting and keep people wondering or worrying what was going on. Didn’t seem like a fair way to discontinue the blog, given you’ve invited me into your lives all these years. Kinda like when you have a guest over – how weird would it be if they just got up and walked out without saying “See you later” and “Thanks” first?
So “See you later, and thank you.”
Please keep me in your prayers, because the next few months will be the most exciting, scary, uncertain, uplifting, revealing, challenging months in my life. I will be praying for you, every day.
To my Anonymuse - thank you for kicking me in the ass when I needed it. I love you for that – but don’t go anywhere, cos I may need it some more.
Sister Patricia sends her regards, and blesses each of you through the kinetic power of the Cosmic Oneness of Metaphysical Singularity, and has promised to keep a chicory-hemp incense stick lit for as long as I’m away. As if she needs a reason…