President Obama is delivering his State of the Union address this Tuesday,
February 10 February 12. Whoop-de-doo. Even if you paid me a billion dollars, I wouldn’t listen to one syllable emerging from his lying vocal chords…I’d watch it on mute, without captions, for a billion bucks, but I wouldn’t listen.
In fact, I’d do any of the ten following things rather than listen to Obama talk about himself and his destructive plans for our nation:
1. Sit through a 1000-contestant Gilbert Gottfried impersonation challenge.
2. Watch every news conference Nancy Pelosi ever gave when she was Speaker of the House.
3. Invite Ed Schultz, Chris Matthews and Rachel Maddow over for dinner.
4. Attend the LA Religious Education Congress.
5. Witness a Joan Rivers striptease act.
6. Watch “Heaven’s Gate”, “Stop, or My Mother Will Shoot!” and “Battlefield Earth” on a continuous 24-hour loop.
7. Use Microsoft Explorer for a week. Maybe two.
8. Work as Lindsey Lohan’s parole officer for a whole month.
9. Watch every episode of “Cop Rock!” and “afterM*A*S*H*”.
What about you? What would you rather do than listen to Obama’s SOTU address Tuesday?