1st Annual AoftheA Limerick Contest

With All Saints Day quickly approaching, the AoftheA Department of Fun & Games has decided to launch the 1st Annual AoftheA Limerick Contest, with the inaugural contest in honor of the holy saints of the Catholic Church.

The rules are very simple – just write a limerick based on a saint, between now and Nov 1. Pen as many as you like.  Write ‘em in the combox, and the Department of Fun & Games staff will select a winner on All Saints Day.  Bingo bango bongo – easy.

The funnier the better – heck, the punnier the better.  We like puns here at AoftheA.

Here’s an example for you:

There once was a girl surnamed Cope
Who took her vows, quite full of hope
To Hawaii, she schleppered
To care for the lepers
And now she’s declared Saint by the Pope!

Start limericking!

And if no one submits one, then I win! Yay me!

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9 responses

  1. ST SIMON-PETER
    A boat owner called Simon left home
    Fished Genasaret’s Lake filled with foam
    Then Jesus called him one of 12 brothers
    Re-named Peter the Rock of the others
    Matryred later as bishop of Rome

  2. There once was a man named Brebeuf,
    And as Jesuits go, he was tough,
    His courage set him apart,
    so some locals ate his heart
    ‘Cause they wanted to get some of that right stuff.

    In Ireland they say that Patrick was here.
    From coast to coast, from far to near,
    He converted the land,
    which they thought was grand
    And in his honour we now drink green beer,

  3. There once was a Sir Thomas named More
    Whose king wished to marry a whore
    More would not bend
    The old marriage to end
    And so his poor head rolled ‘pon the floor.

    One for someone who isn’t a saint

    There once was a Guido from Arezzo,
    Who trained young novices to sing mezzo
    It took ten years
    To train their young ears
    ‘Til Guido came up with do, re, mi, fa and sol.

  4. St. Joseph had dreams and a colt,
    and to Egypt he said he would bolt.
    With the babe and his wife,
    under threat of their life,
    he escaped, while the king looked a dolt.

  5. A man from Michigan, Larry D,
    Said come up with Saintly limericks punny
    I tried very hard,
    But I’m not the Bard
    Though Larry someday a saint may be.

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  7. The king in a covetous mood
    Thought Lawrence incredibly rude
    When the deacon said bold
    That the poor were church gold
    So he had poor Saint Lars barbecued.
    ———————————————–
    King Henry believed he was God
    (For he couldn’t keep zipped up his cod)
    But his friend Thomas More
    Said “Thou art not, for sure”
    So the king struck Tom’s head from his bod.
    ——————————————
    Helena, the emperor’s mum
    Decided to get off her bum.
    The legends now say,
    In a marvelous way
    She found the True Cross (and then some).

    But finding the Cross is not myth.
    We all should be looking forthwith,
    And finding, most gaily
    Should take It up daily
    And cling to our faith’s Megalith.

  8. There once was a good man named Izzy
    He didn’t want his boss to have a tizzy
    When he went to Mass
    An angel came fast
    In order to make him look busy

  9. Mrs Rudd; Obviously UK and clever. I was puzzled by your reference to megalith, literally large stone/rock when the topic was the cross, wood. You may have 1 been referring to Jesus as Rock or 2. Famed irreverent Irish genius B Behan who said Jesus founded His Church on the Rock, Peter, while Henry V111 used his two pebbles to establish his version of same Church.

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