Jennifer W. Jordan K. Victoria R. Kaspar L. Doug W. Tammie L. David B. Kelly G. Troy R. Heidi M.
Focus hard on those names. Stretch your memory and try to recall where you might have heard of them, even though their last names have been intentionally abbreviated. Think. Take your time.
It’s a safe bet that 99.9% of you don’t know who those people are.
Who are they? They’re part of the group that became Catholic this past Easter Vigil at my local parish. They’re just regular folks, with regular jobs and regular lives, raising regular families, each of whom became Catholic for their own reasons, and are now fellow brothers and sisters in this crazy thing called the Mystical Body of Christ, the Catholic Church.
But they’re not Catholic bloggers.
And none were named Leah Libresco, the high profile blogging atheist who announced her inspiring and awesome decision last week to become Catholic.
They weren’t interviewed on CNN after making the decision to become Catholic. They didn’t write an on-line essay that generated 150,000 page views. They don’t belong to a Catholic web portal that gets millions of hits a month. They weren’t the subject of numerous blog posts, tweets and articles. They didn’t find themselves under the microscope as people from all sides of belief publicly opined, argued and discussed their decision. Maybe they said something on their Facebook page about becoming Catholic, I don’t know. Chances are still slim to none that they got widespread coverage in the Catholic blogosphere…oh, and slim just left town.
Their decision to become Catholic is no less noteworthy, though, even if very few people – outside of immediate family and friends – were aware of it. Their choice to trust and believe is no less commendable and wonderful and pleasing in the sight of God. Some may have risked alienation from family members, or lost friendships as a result. Most probably gained new friends, and earned deeper respect from those who love them, and found themselves more connected to a wider community. And most importantly, they’ve discovered a deeper love for Christ and His Church, and maybe even asked themselves “Why didn’t I do this sooner?”
Now, some may argue I’m setting up a false comparison between these regular folks and someone who has earned a certain level of fame on the Internet – and I’m sure that fame is well-deserved, based on the acclaims of her character and intelligence and wit, blogged about by many people. I’m not a regular reader of hers (I did read a couple posts of hers as I wrote this one, and she’s impressive), but I had heard enough about her, such that when the Big Announcement was made she would be joining the Catholic Portal at Patheos (the first non-Catholic to do so, I believe, which is interesting in and of itself), I wasn’t asking “Leah who?”
You know, like 99.9% of you were asking “Jennifer W.? Jordan K? Who are they?” Remember?
But this post has nothing to do about Leah and her decision. This is about how so many others are reacting to her decision.
Many are praying for her, and are very happy for her – as we should be – that she’s taken hold of the answer to her relentless pursuit of truth…or rather, that the relentless pursuit of the Truth has taken hold of her. Another soul preparing itself to love God with purposeful amendment and passion. Another member that will hopefully join this crazy thing called the Mystical Body of Christ next Easter.
Just like Jennifer W., Jordan R. and the thousands upon thousands of others across this world who became Catholic this past Easter. All precious and unique in the eyes of God, with their own purpose and mission and vocation.
But she’s not a 1st round draft pick, while these regular folks are just pew fillers. She’s not a prized turned enemy super-spy. The Church hasn’t landed an All-Star free agent from Team Atheist. But from the breathless excitement at having a new Catholic blogger (pant! pant!), and Patheos’ director of marketing (really? they have one of those?) saying her post had over 150,000 page views (ohmyohmyohmy!)… for goodness sake, it’s rather embarrassing! Imagine the reaction if someone really famous signed up for RCIA classes!
Granted, many if not most of the comments at her Conversion Announcement post were supportive and welcoming and full of charity. It’s a wonderful testament of the joy of our faith, that so many are happily waiting on the other side of the door that was knocked upon and opened. But as one of the commenters said: “Don’t be disturbed if fellow Catholics make things just as hard for you as atheists.” How very true – and that is nowhere more evident than in the Catholic blogosphere at large.
All this attention on Leah makes me wonder how many people approach the regular folks at their local parishes going through RCIA, telling them how happy they are at their becoming Catholic, and that they’re being prayed for. Personally. Sure, they don’t have popular blogs, but should that even matter?
Which leads me to my next point. Now, I was going to lay out some advice for Leah, but after giving it some thought, I’ve concluded that anything I say would only be self-promotion, and would be unhelpful. She’s most likely getting great advice from some great people already, people she knows and trusts and relies upon. She seems to be handling all this hubbub quite well so far. So I wish her well as she continues on her faith journey, and she’s included in my prayers along with everyone else who’s on the path of conversion.
What I will mention, though, is this: I’ve been a member of the Catholic blogonomy for 4+ years, so I think I have a slight shred of credibility in speaking about it. It’s this burgeoning thing I’ve dubbed the Cult of Catholic Celebritease. The hubbub over Leah’s conversion – a conversion that hasn’t concluded, let’s not forget – is the latest prime example of it. Please read that statement again – Leah’s conversion is not a prime example of it – it’s the hubbub that’s a prime example of it. A Google search of ‘Leah Libresco conversion story’ rings up 37,500 results – to be fair, not all of them are from Catholic sites, but nonetheless, that’s an impressive number for a story that’s only a week old, and it’s good that people are talking about it. Or maybe they’re arguing about it, I don’t know. Comboxes – Catholic or not – tend to be verbal shark tanks where blood-letting is favorable to charitable exchanges, so I avoid them as much as possible.
Conversely, if you google ‘US personal Anglican ordinariate Jan 2012′ (it opened on Jan 1), you’ll get about 46,000 hits. Which covers a longer time span. And a lot more converts. Now, that story has far-reaching implications on the life of the Church. Perhaps it just wasn’t as sexy.
What am I implying? How about if we leave the rejoicing at the conversion of one soul to the hosts of heaven, and us bloggers just shut the hell up? After all, shouldn’t we be just as ecstatic and elated when a Jennifer W. or Jordan R. becomes Catholic? They count too, right?
I’ll be writing more on the Cult of Catholic Celebritease as time permits.
Well said, Larry.
Larry,
My husband and I (thank God, together) were received into the Church 8 years ago. You know how when you’re in RCIA and you’re called up to the front for a blessing before you leave Mass for the classes so everyone there know that you’re were new and all? Well, we just left that parish and now drive half an hour away for a tiny parish that reminds us of our little protestant churches (My husband was a pastor.). Because no one chatted with us; no one invited us over; no connections at all. After a few years, WE tried inviting people over, or sometimes just asked folks if they were staying for doughnuts and we were actually told No thanks. Four times.
We were just nice, regular people. No local fame. Nobodies. We are Catholic because we found the Truth, not because “the people were so welcoming.”
Now I’m not sure if this fits with your post here, but it’s early, the kids are sleeping, and I’m on my second cup of coffee!
God bless you and your local, newly Catholic (yippee!) friends. And thanks for writing!
Warmly,
Allison H.
Allison,
I’m totally with you. I love the Church, love the truth, but Catholics stink at being welcoming. It’s something we need to work on.
Said by a revert blogger who runs in semi-celeb circles. The good news is that between the loneliness and the lousy music, if we’re Catholic it’s because we know it’s TRUE, and no other reason.
.
Jen.
Mrs. Howell, you sound like a lovely person. I’m glad you and your family
chose to join the Church, and I’m happy to hear that you found a parish
that seems like a better fit– it sounds to me that it’s your old parish’s loss.
Larry, I think your post was spot-on.
Terrific post, Larry. I look forward to reading your continuing posts on the subject.
Allison H., sadly your comment rings true for some of us cradles, too. Our family attended a parish in this area for *years* and only knew people because we had some family members in the area. Even when we joined the choir at that parish we were unknown outside that small group.
The difference with our little, rural parish is night and day. People are lovely there. There’s so much going on that if you remain unknown it’s only by choice (and I respect the deeply introverted who’d rather have it that way). I know, though, as a life-long Catholic how totally rare our parish experience now is, and how much more common it is to go to a Catholic parish for years and be invisible unless you have tons of money or local celebrity (lawyers, doctors, etc.) or belong to the “right” committee.
Excellent!
I think all those people you listed were on The View this morning – except for Tammie – I didn’t see Tammie. I switched it off however.
I, too, think this is spot-on. Thanks and God bless!
Pingback: Logos Catechism Mobile App Chesterton Manalive Larry Brinkin LCWR | Big Pulpit
I am SO glad you shared this…I posted the following on another “Catholic Celebritease” blog site, a person who I deeply respect but who is also relatively new in the Faith (since 2008) and who as well is on the path to the Catholic version of “Wheel of Fortune.” See below for an excerpt from my comments from his page…
“We do need to keep supporting her. We also need to remember that it may take some time for her to realize that Yoga and bisexuality may be areas she will need to think through, and we need to let her get through that process before booking her at every Catholic conference in the nation. I also just pray that the more conservative branches of the Church, or more traditional I should say, will give her that chance without questioning her sincerity and the like, and then turning on her at some point. It happens far too often.
Thus we need to pray for her, support her, and stay truthful with her in any contacts via her blog or otherwise. My biggest fear is that she will be made into a ‘Catholic celebrity’ before she is ready for that role and that can be ruinous to all involved.
God bless her and may our Blessed Mother keep her.”
Interestingly, I did not get even ONE reply from anyone reading that blog. I think we can do her a great disservice by pushing her into the limelight before she has the chance to search and experience the Faith from the INSIDE for at least a year or two. But by then she may not be big news anymore. Or, worse, she may have “left the Church to become a REAL Christian.” It happens. Often.
I see your point, and I definitely think that some of the rejoicing is about “landing” a prime player from “Team Atheist”. But I think that some of us rejoice that someone so clearly intelligent and educated is reasoning her way into the faith, and writing about it in such a compelling and appealing way. I was thrilled for all of the RCIA candidates and catechumens at our parish this year, but I am happier still about Leah Libresco because she has the potential to lead many others to the Church. Catholicboyrichard also makes a great point, though, which is that “Catholic celebrity” could be harmful to Leah’s conversion process. Those of us who think about her more and pray for her more than we do for other converts don’t do so because we think she’s more important than other converts, but because we believe that she’ll probably face more tests in her conversion than most converts will. Great post!
Nice post. I am not sure what experiences some have had about “non-welcoming.” But during my last several years teaching and forming candidaties in RCIA in our parish I have found tremendous welcoming sentiments. Most of my candidates came to the Catholic Church because of familiarity with our local Church community and the charisma of our pastor. May we welcome many more to our Church because of our example as disciples of Jesus Christ.
Peace,
JoeK
But during my last several years teaching and forming candidaties in RCIA in our parish…
There is something quite frightening to me about that, Joe. Do you subject these new converts with the same opinions you share here, or do you stick to the teaching of the Church?
So why not interview one of the new members of your parish and write an article about them for your blog? It sounds like this is what you’re being inspired to do. Why further vulgarize Leah’s conversion by mentioning it here?
Meredith I must jump in on LarryD’s defense here…I do not see one word of “vulgarizing” of Leah’s wonderful conversion. I think every person who commented, as well as LarryD’s post, call it a sincerely wonderful thing. The point seems to be, what about the “unsung heroes” who we may never hear of? I do agree with you though that interviewing some of them would be a great touch too. But I think it is in order and in fact needful to share very real concerns without in any way attempting to be hurtful towards Leah. What God has done in her life is amazing. But, like any new believer, she needs some time to be discipled. I pray that the well-meaning “celebrity seekers” give her that opportunity.
The last thing I would ever do to a new convert is subject them to the harsh and relentless lens of the Catholic blogosphere.
And it’s ironic you mention that, btw. Yesterday, at the local Catholic book store, I happened to meet one of the newly baptized members from the local church. I shook his hand, congratulated him and said welcome to the family. His joy and exuberance at becoming Catholic was pure and real and invigorating. The furthest thing from my mind was “Wow! I should interview him for my blog!” Neither did I say “you can learn a lot more about the faith by reading Catholic blogs”. He was in a book store, he was looking to increase his faith through legitimate means, and to shine a spotlight on him would more than likely cause more harm than good.
So no, interviewing these new converts is not going to happen. They would gain nothing, and could lose much.
Good point LarryD, and that was my original thought on both of my comments about Leah actually. She has her hands full enough just quietly growing and getting her feet wet in the Faith, and without everyone from CNN to the Athiest Monthly (or did I mean the National Cathlyc Reporter lol) writing and opining on her.
As to the interview idea I tend to agree mostly. It could be a worthwhile venture after the person has been in the Church a year or two, provided that they are stable and open, but never foisted upon them–that would be for sure.
I should clarify, LarryD, I mean I agree with you on the interview point. At least until the person is truly stable and ready and even then done with caution and care.
There are several things about this “public conversion” that is going on I find very disturbing.
1. The “high-end” Catholic bloggers have all but canonized the poor girl.
2. She is blogging on a Catholic site and referring to herself as a convert when she hasn’t been received into the Church.
3. The public nature of this whole thing is really off-putting and has the potential to do great harm.
And………I would never suggest a candidate for the Church read any Catholic blog and would vehemently discourage it. I was on the RCIA team for 9 years at our local parish. Our program lasted one year during which we read and studied the entire catechism. We met for two hours every week and we still felt like we barely scratched the surface.
I also find people who claim to be bisexual very disturbing. It shows a certain lack of discrimination. Sort of a “what ever is handy” will do just fine.
I fear this is not going to end well.
Adrienne I agree. It is exactly what was done to Anne Rice. No one bothered to find out if she had been DISCIPLED and not just “back to the Church.” She had always had differences with Rome as it turned out, but there she was on EWTN and everywhere else–and writing “religious” books. There is a huge difference between coming back and coming home. When I came back 7 years ago, I was a full-fledged “Cathlyc” as LarryD likes to spell it. Meaning I was a cradle Catholic but re-entered directy through the Cafeteria door–the same revolving one I had left through 35 years earlier.
Thank God we had a good RCIA program and it was recommended to me by one of the parish secretaries–and I started it 2 weeks after I had revolved my way in. I very honestly started out assuming I knew “better” than the folks in my class (including the teachers) but would humor them so I could get confirmed and participate in parish activities!!! But God knew me far better than I did. Thankfully.
Well I had a rude, rude awakening. By the time I was confirmed 7 months later I actually, for the first time in my adult life, knew what it even meant to be a Catholic Christian. And I was on board. Even then I still slipped deeply a couple years later for a bit–totally my fault. But I thank God for His Mercy because the seeds sown in that RCIA class took root and I was back within months. And by the way I identified as “gay” back then too. I was celibate already personally but not convinced it was neccesary for everyone. So as to her bisexuality, God can certainly take care of that, but she needs to not be put into the “dog-and-pony” circuit for awhile–or canonized prematurely– but rather quietly taken aside, one-on-one, and allowed to grow in-depth rather than booked at the next WYD or something as guest speaker!!! And then condemned when she falls off her pedestal.
We as a Church are responsible for her soul now. We need to take care of it–and her.
You said that you wondered how many regular folks at Leah’s parish are talking to her and telling her that they’re praying for her etc. I can tell you how many people in my parish told me things like that when I converted three years ago: zero. In fact in three years of attending mass every week and other parish functions, the number of people who have talked to me is still zero. This has been just one of many reasons I’ve grown disillusioned with the Catholic church. I went to check out a non-denominational church last weekend and about 25% of the congregation introduced themselves to me after the service (it would have probably been more but I had to leave) and the minister personally contacted me a few days later to welcome me and say that his door was open if I had anything I wanted to discuss.
I’ve mentioned this on other Catholic sites before and had the Catholics there tell me that it was too bad no one had welcomed me but that I should basically get over it because church isn’t about the other people. I get that and all but the Bible does say that we are called to be in fellowship with other believers. “Fellowship” doesn’t mean just sitting by each other in the pews silently then leaving church in a hurry.
Unless something really changes my heart I don’t see myself staying with the Catholic church. It’s not a “community” at all. The only times people have talked to me before or after church were to criticize the way my son was sitting. Leah’s conversion may be one of many every year, but what I’d really like to know is how many are still practicing 5 years after that first Easter vigil.
Oh no, please stay! It is the One, Holy, Catholic, and Apostolic Church. That’s the point. We now drive half an hour to attend a smaller parish (like, 100 people) and began inviting people over. You know what? Folks said yes and we’ve made friends. Perhaps it’s us converts that should do the inviting, and I don’t mean joining groups where socialization is forced. I mean, “Hey, would you guys like to join us for lunch next Sunday?” or “How about meeting at the park tomorrow?” My husband, the ex-pastor, reminded me once (I was probably whining…!) that when new faces showed up at our small AG church, we wanted validation; we wanted people to stay and see how great our congregation was. The Catholic church doesn’t fly that way, so socialization is different. Anyway, enough preaching from me. Shall we toss some cheese and crackers in the van and meet at the park?!
With a full heart,
Allison
WONDERFUL words, Allison–I was A/G too (including ministry) for 20 of my 35 years outside of Catholicism. Much of what brought me there, was actually 2 things in fact–they actually read the Bible, not just “listened” to excerpts from it at Mass (do not get me wrong, both are valuable, but we need both!) and people actually talked to me from the youth group and made me feel like I mattered. That is the nature of a smaller congregation, and also the nature of having a “sanctuary” with no Eucharist. We did not see the need to stay quiet after or before the service. But we also missed something vital to our worship in that process.
As to Catholics being less social it is a very real issue, however, and I do not minimize it. But waiting for the people to reach out to us is not Scriptural anyway…Proverbs tells us that (paraphrasing now) if we wish to make friends we must “show ourselves to be friendly.” Will it always work? No. But most Catholic parishes have men’s or women’s groups, RCIA is always needing sponsors, the kitchen is always needing clean-up crews, the altar needs EMHC (Extraordinary Ministers of Holy Communion) and onward. And in every one of those cases friends are waiting for us.
Praying about one’s involvement is so very vital–and I am not saying it is easy by any means. But I do recall one thing that happened to me shortly after I finished RCIA–I ASSUMED no one knew me, or in fact gave a rat’s rear if I was there or not. NOT true. One day perhaps a month or so after I was confirmed in 2006, we had the Rosary after Mass. I led one decade as they allowed random folks to just do so so I built up my courage and jumped in. Afterwards a woman I had never met before came up to me and said “weren’t you just in RCIA?” She talked to me for a bit and was greatly encouraging. She saw me at the altar during Easter Vigil and had been praying for me. It was a fairly large parish but SHE NOTICED me. Yet if I had not led in that Rosary decade I would have never known it.
Catholics do need each other–all Christians do. We are the body of Christ. We should encourage one another more–but rest assured someone you did not know or may have never even spoken to was indeed praying for you, whether you know it or not. And do not leave. Stay because the Church is true. Not because it is “Club God” and a social fiesta. Stay and make it better. You may be surprised who has been praying for you. I was.
I became Catholic three years ago. The only way I know people in the parish is through a coffee hour after one of the daily masses (it meets once a month except in the summer), a book club (where we read the same novels as other book clubs & never discuss them from a moral, let alone Catholic, viewpoint) and a mission week. I see the same people at mass each Sunday, but the leave before the last hymn or chat with friends: no one has said more than hello to me. Part of the problem of large parishes is not knowing if someone is new to the parish or new to that specific mass. I will never leave the Catholic church, in spite of the lack of community. I will continue to look for ways to connect with the parish and with Catholic groups that span the diocese. And, once I feel comfortable critiquing the church, I will see what I can do to make people feel more welcome.
I have read all the comments and note all the “lack of welcoming” remarks. I’ve seen this many times before and it still amazes me. Why? Perhaps I’m weird. Actually, no. I know I’m weird. I’ve been weird all my life, so it feels normal to me! So, know right away that I have a totally different opinion on this from those of you who are sad, or confused, or any other way sorry that people are not approaching you to welcome you!
I am totally happy to be at Mass and no one, absolutely no one, approaches me to welcome me there. I do not go to church to find new friends. I do not want to be greeted at the door by someone from the Welcoming Committee. I know that any Catholic church, where the Blessed Sacrament is in the Tabernacle, and where Holy Mass is celebrated, is my home. I go there to worship the Lord. If I know someone there, or by chance, get to know someone there, that’s great, but it has no effect whatever on whether I feel welcome or not. I know I am welcome there, even if I am never spoken to by human beings.
Yes, I know I am weird, but I think those who are tempted to leave the Church because they were not made to feel welcome are the ones who are weird! Jesus welcomes you there every time you visit.
Of course, you are more than welcome to join one or more of the apostolates (I don’t like the term Ministry to be used for what us lay people do that is not liturgical) – in fact I’d love it if some of you could join the Prayer Shawl Apostolate I started in my parish – but I do not live in the US.
A hearty welcome to all converts and reverts. Immerse yourselves in the Catholic church and grow deeper and deeper in faith with each passing day. Stay with us, and remember, the Catholic church is your home. You are always welcome there. Jesus is waiting for you there.
Joan M,
You are NOT weird. Not only do I see this exactly as you, I believe that if one compares all the times we see/hear those lamenting not having been greetedg to the vast majority of folks who never mention it, we may legitimately conclude that you and I are representative of how most Catholics see it.
And Dorothy above makes a good point, as well, when she suggests that unless the church in question has only 100 members or so (and that’s the rare Catholic Church) it is virtually impossible for anyone to recognize who is new. As a result, the any expectation that anyone will approach you are unrealistic.
I intend no disrespect for those complaints (and I suspect you don’t, either), but I just realized the possible applicabilty to this concern of an old adage:
If you want a friend, be a friend.
I wonder if those expressing a need for others to “welcome” them are not the same kinds of folks to whom that adage might be said.
To those folks, let me add that I suspect a basic shyness may account for such a need for others to take the lead in pulling you into the life of the Church, but what lies beneath probabally is wider and deeper than that. Regardless, once you join a Church the best way to get to know people is to attend events and activities outside Mass. Grab the bulletin (or visit the Church web site) and get the names of folks heading up various activities of interest, and then e-mail or call them.Volunteer for things in whatever way you can.
Take some repsonsibility for your own membership in the Church, and be the one who reaches out to others. Not only would doing so benefit you richly in ways you can’t antidipate now, It would be a spiritual tragedy if you left the True Church after having found your way to it.
God bless all those for whom entering into the fullness of church life does not come so easily.
Pingback: And when it came to G.K.C. no one really knew until afterwards, and they were all like, "Whaa!", except for one sister who said to him,… | Catholic Canada
+JMJ+
A few months ago, an “occasionally practicing” Catholic friend whose cousins had become Evangelical and were trying to get her to make the leap to their church told me that the biggest draw of their community was that everyone was so friendly and welcoming.
I said, “I don’t know. For me, the biggest draw of the Catholic Church is that you can be in any Catholic church in the world, sobbing your heart out while crawling to the altar on your hands and knees, and no one will bother you.”
Hyperbole, of course.
But we both had a good laugh.
Pingback: Leah, “Magic Mike,” and Anne Rice | catholicboyrichard
Pingback: Leah, “Magic Mike,” and Anne Rice | anglicanboyrichard